The Biggest Loser

I’m losing and gaining the same 3 pounds repeatedly (232-235 lbs) for the past 2 weeks because I’m in a holding pattern with exercise and having the same diet issues I’ve talked about previously. This past week I just wanted sandwhiches everyday and I don’t think my body was happy with the extra carbs from the bread. I don’t purposely do low carb but I have been restricting bread and cake until the past week. I think I ate bread almost every day of last week. I start off my days pretty good eating my oatmeal, then for lunch I’ll have like baked chicken, broccoli and half a yam. Then what ends up happening is I go out to a meetup.com event or I meet my boyfriend for karaoke and I end up getting something to eat for dinner and that is where I go off track. I always order like burgers or quesidilla, never anything light and healthy when I go out.

I keep trying but this healthy lifestyle thing is a hard one to get adjusted to long term.

My yummy boyfriend gets me to go to the gym with him sometimes like yesterday, but I haven’t been going on my own for the past 2 weeks.

This week I had to put a hold on personal training for a few months because I’m having trouble financially which actually might also be the reason I’m not motivated to exercise. When I am secure financially for some reason I feel calm and at peace and when I feel like that I want to exercise. When I feel unstable I want to eat and sleep or drink alcohol. If only I could reverse that. It’s all a mind game with me especially with exercise.

My apartment complext set up a Biggest Loser Challenge and I signed up for it, so hopefully that will get me motivated for the next 3 weeks atleast. It comes with a Personal Trainer every Saturday, we start this Saturday. I’m actually not the most competitive person, ironic since i want to be a figure competitor. But it would be cool if I won the challenge so I’m going to put in extra effort. I was thinking maybe I can get some of the other participants to exercise with me during the week. I like working out with other people.

I may have setbacks, which inevitably make my journey longer, but I haven’t given up and I’m not going to give up.

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