I start Graduate school in 2 days and I am so scared
When I am feeling vulnerable like this , the only person I want to talk to is my ex boyfriend who I broke up with 5 months ago
I know it’s a bad idea to text him
I just know he could make me feel better
But then I would feel bad about pulling him back in when I am only going to break up with him again
he doesn’t need me to be wishy washy with him
I need to be independent
I’m scared that I’m not smart enough
I’m scared I’m going to flunk out the first semester
The reason I think I am not smart enough is because I took a statistics class last Spring and would have flunked if I hadn’t dropped the class before that could happen. I dropped the class at the last minute right before final exams, because I did the math and I was on track to get a D in the class
The other reason I don’t think I’m smart enough is that I didn’t get a high score on the GRE and because of that I didn’t get accepted into my top 2 Graduate schools. I got a 296 on the GRE
I’m so nervous my stomach hurts and I feel nauseous. Everyone keeps saying I’ll do fine but that doesn’t help. I need someone to explain how I am smart when I didn’t get accepted into my top 2 schools and flunked statistics.
I really need to talk to my therapist but she’s been evading me for over a month. So now I have to demand a new therapist at the clinic I go to. UGH!